Despite my comments earlier in the week about how much I love the Autumn, I must confess to being a little down, or rather a lot down, it was an indigo day in fact. I am suffering from a lot of stress and tension related to our financial situation. Because, although having returned to full time employment as of the 1st October our human resources department still has not completed the paperwork. Furthermore unless they do it by the beginning of November then the chances are that I’m not going to feel the benefit of the extra days pay until the middle of December.
In order to meet bills we are having to watch our finances very carefully. I am running out of places I can save money, other than food that is and we’ve never really wasted that. Anyway, today I feel the hole we are in, I feel it in my whole body. I feel blocked, I feel constrained and I feel it in my gut, in my belly, in my intestines and my bowels. It is a taut string running from the top to the bottom and it cripples me, I can’t think and therefore I can’t work.
Food in the house the last few weeks has been very much comfort food. Husband has been serving up big bowls of pasta, tomatoes and cheese or sausage and mash. A bag of pudding rice has appeared. The Atkins diet has no place in this household, its carbohydrates all the way.
Tonight I need something simpler though, something my gut can deal with, that will cheer me up and comfort at the same time, something that looks happy in the bowl. Coincidently my kitchen has been dominated by the presence of a very large pumpkin, hoping to end its days as something more than a lantern on the 31st… I also have some cream that needs using, as do most of my spices which spent 6 months in storage during the house works.
I follow vaguely a Nigel Slater recipe for pumpkin soup, which can be found here but is also in Real Good Food which is a book compiled from early articles from Nigel’s Observer columns. This incidently is one of my earliest cookbooks. The soup recipe was possibly one of the reasons I bought the book (that and his description of BBQing sweetcorn). Hopefully, the remains of it will do for lunch for what’s left of this week…when my mind needs soothing I cook cake, when its my body that is in crisis I need more than sugars.
postscript The lovely Mrs Zee with whom I work has found a human in the cyber department our human resources has become and has persuaded them to press the right buttons on the computer so that I get paid the right amounts in November, even if the paperwork follows later.